PEST CONTROL: SUPERVISORS SPRAY TAX DOLLARS ON 'HIGH RISK' BUREAUCRACY

It seems the Santa Barbara County Board of Supervisors is determined to ensure no taxpayer dollar goes unspent, even if it means funding a war on bugs no one's actually seen. Their latest bureaucratic masterpiece, an $84,392.69 'High Risk Pest Exclusion Agreement' with the California Department of Food and Agriculture (CDFA), is exactly the kind of fiscal ingenuity we've come to expect from our local overlords.

While everyday folks are trying to keep their homes and businesses from being devoured by inflation and ever-increasing taxes, the Board is busy approving funds for a 'program' that sounds suspiciously like a line item from a 'Mad Magazine' parody. One wonders if these 'high risk pests' are actually just a cleverly disguised consortium of under-employed state entomologists needing a new SUV. The real 'high risk' here is the continued expansion of government into every nook and cranny of our lives, all while declaring the whole charade 'not a project under CEQA.' Of course it isn't – it's just another cash transfer to Sacramento, neatly tucked away from public scrutiny.

One can almost picture the esteemed supervisors, pens in hand, diligently signing off on agreements they likely haven't read, secure in the knowledge that they're protecting us from the dreaded... whatever it is. Meanwhile, small businesses are still drowning in regulations and residents are fleeing the state, but rest assured, your county government is keeping those theoretical pests at bay. The biggest pest, it seems, is the one in the Sacramento statehouse continually siphoning off local wealth for its endless mandates and make-work projects. Perhaps the Supervisors should focus on excluding *that* high-risk entity.

It's a wonder they didn't tack on a 'climate change impact fee' for the carbon footprint of these mythical pests. At this rate, we'll need a 'high risk taxpayer exclusion program' to protect us from the Board's spending habits. But don't worry, the check is in the mail to the CDFA, ensuring that someone, somewhere, is very pleased with Santa Barbara County's generous contribution to the 'pest control' industrial complex.