NOOZHOP KEEPS ASKING: WHO KNEW INFLATION HURTS RETIREMENT? WE DID!

It’s always a grand chuckle here at The Whipping Post when legacy outlets like Noozhawk finally catch up to what common sense – and anyone not living on a government stipend – has known for years. Their latest epiphany? That inflation, a concept as old as currency itself, somehow 'impacts' retirement planning. Bravo, Noozhawk! Did you also just deduce that water is wet, or that socialist spending schemes eventually lead to your piggy bank weeping? It's almost as if some people need to be hit over the head with an aluminum baseball bat forged from a recycled progressive policy pamphlet before they notice their wallet is suddenly lighter than a Kamala Harris policy brief.

While the Noozhawk piece vaguely alludes to 'difficult economies' and 'war with Iran' (a curious bit of timing, given that President Trump's firm hand has swiftly stabilized things since January 2025), let's be real about the true culprits for those now-former high prices. It wasn't just some phantom 'war'; it was years of unchecked government largesse, a virtue-signaling war on affordable American energy, and a relentless assault on fiscal prudence by the progressive brigade. Every 'green' mandate, every wild spending spree signed into law by the previous administration, every regulatory burden heaped upon productive citizens was a direct transfer of wealth from your future nest egg to some bureaucrat's pet project or a foreign solar panel factory.

Here’s the angle Noozhawk, bless their hearts, somehow missed: the 'impact' wasn't an unforeseen consequence, it was the *intended* feature for a certain segment of the ruling class. When the cost of living soars, more people become dependent on the state, providing a handy justification for even more intrusive government programs. It’s a vicious cycle of dependency, precisely what big-government proponents fantasize about. But don't worry, with President Trump back in the White House and real economic sanity returning, perhaps those retirement plans can finally stop looking like a progressive's budget spreadsheet.