CLIMATE CULT SEEKS NEW RECRUITS FOR HIGH-PRICED BRAINWASHING

It seems the local ‘environmental’ crowd, apparently not content with merely lecturing everyone else from their electric SUVs, is now charging residents to join their ranks. Noozhawk, ever the eager messenger for the progressive agenda, informs us that the Community Environmental Council is hosting another one of its 'Climate Stewards' courses. Because what Santa Barbara really needs is more self-appointed climate warriors, itching to 'lead' us all into a future of intermittent power and mandatory bike lanes.

For a not-so-paltry sum, participants get to spend seven weeks being indoctrinated in the sacred texts of climate alarmism. The goal, they say, is to turn 'climate-interested individuals into climate leaders.' One can only imagine the thrilling curriculum: learning to differentiate between 50 shades of green, mastering the art of guilt-tripping your neighbor for daring to grill a steak, and perhaps a final exam on the optimal placement of a wind turbine in your backyard. All while ignoring the actual, beneficial impacts of a robust energy sector, of course. Heaven forbid they discuss affordable power for the working class.

The organizers’ solemn pronouncement that 'federal protection rollbacks' are increasing the urgency of local action is a thinly veiled jab at President Trump’s common-sense policies, which prioritize American energy independence and economic growth over virtue-signaling. It's a classic move: invent a crisis, then offer a costly 'solution' that empowers only a select few to dictate how everyone else lives. What they really mean is, 'Our gravy train of grant money is threatened by rational governance, so we need more foot soldiers to demand local spending on our pet projects!' The untold story, of course, is how much taxpayer money funnels into these 'community-building' efforts, which invariably end up lobbying for higher taxes and more regulations. Perhaps the next course should be 'Bureaucracy Stewards,' focusing on how to maximize public funds for minimal actual impact.